:: Venting Insanity ::

:: Friday, April 30, 2004 ::

today's code word... negativity
Yeah... I'm going nuts. All people do is complain lately. I didn't even go to work today because I just didn't think I'd be able to handle it. I already have two full days in... I don't know if I can work more than five more hours this week.

Yeah... Barbara went down to Financial Aid and got me approved for more money in my account for Work Study. I'm cool with that... Lord knows I need the extra cash. But, the complaining and negativity around that school lately are just killing me. I can't wait until the SIFE nationals are over.

Of course, I'm not even elected, yet, and already I'm doing a ton of work for the SGA. Elections closed today. In a way, I hope DeAnne gets President... or Frank gets Vice President. Then again, I'll probably stick around for another position come the rest of the elections in September if I don't get President.

{{sigh}}

Why do I do this to myself?

can't sleep?
Yeah... as you can see... it's rediculously early in the morning and I'm blogging. My sleep patterns are screwed up again. I seriously need to get rid of some of this stress. I'm still blah... still annoyed at everyone... still just... GAH. It's one of the reasons I'm avoiding Messenger programs... I can't deal right now. I'm too touchy and I don't want to piss people off... or get pissed off, for that matter.

I might say something I'll regret.

back to tutoring
Barbara's bending the rules a bit. I've got another student I need to get caught up by the end of the semester... which is next week. Go figure. I was supposed to meet him today, but I didn't go in. I just couldn't do it. I don't like the way I'm feeling lately. I've been so fake.

smile and nod
Sometimes I wish I wasn't afraid to show people how I really feel. Yet, I feel like I always have to be upbeat and outgoing. It's not how I feel... I don't want to be upbeat and outgoing... but it's how I act. Otherwise, I get too many questions. I hate questions. I don't like talking to people about what I'm feeling and I hate when they ask me, "Are you sure nothing's wrong?"

I wish they'd leave me alone, sometimes.

So, I pretend everything's okay.

Hmm... maybe that's why I like Duo so much...

snapple "real fact" #2
Animals that lay eggs don't have belly buttons.